So in this post I will talk about the person who is very much implicated in the pregnancy and the birth, but is not physically going to give birth to the child to come, or the baby that has joined us on earth.
You might be the dad and maybe you don't know anything about pregnancy and birth and breastfeeding and all of this, or your family already had a child but you found it difficult and feel you need a little extra support. Or you are in a lesbian relationship and your partner carrying the baby is comfortable with it, but you struggle with some appointments where you are not received in a way that makes you feel included, there are things you would love to understand better, find ways to be part of this whole experience in your own way. Or perhaps you are a gay couple having a baby thanks to a surrogate, and you too are going through a rollercoaster of emotions, and you would like to ensure you have all the tools to give the best start to your baby and to your family. Or you might be the lover, straight or gay, or trans, who cares, you are here, and you want to support the mum and the baby to come in the best way you can.
Basically, all of you can contact me, not particularly for the woman next to you who is expecting, or who has just given birth, she might be content and completely in fine with the way things are going and not feel the need for any extra support.
Good for her, I am really glad she is experiencing it well!
How about you though? Your feelings are important too. You might find that you are experiencing some fear or anxiety around what might happen, how to handle it whilst still being supportive.
Maybe you freak out about being the only support system for the mum, everything is resting on your shoulders. Maybe you have had a first experience and you know how intense it gets, and how much an extra set of eyes and hands and heart can help.
For each and every one of you I am here. Here to give you informations, here to shower you with empathy and guidance. I have the chance as the doula to be detached from your situation, so I can look at your set up and give you tips on how to be the most helpful possible, but firstly, how to be helpful to yourself. You will be the best support available if all your needs are met, and you fully understand what is expected of you.
On top of that, during the birth for instance, I will be the person you can rely on to alternate trips to the bathroom, get some food for you to eat, or let you go whilst I stay with the mum and let her count on me for that short time. I'll also take pictures during this oh so crucial time of your life. I'll let you know on some little secrets of what a woman who is pregnant, or has just given birth might be going through, so you understand better why some things you might not be used to are happening.
My intention is to become a well informed friend that has your back during a very intense time in your life.
I hope you let me be there for you!
Until then, I wish you to take great care of yourself!